Wishing Wellness YouTube Videos

Our YouTube channel is now up and running! We have two videos posted. Video 1 describes a great breathing technique to help with a variety of issues such as anxiety, anger, impulsiveness, stress...The other video describes the impact of stress on the nervous system and how to help improve the stress response. If you like the videos - you can subscribe so you don;t miss out on future posts. Here is the link.

Understanding Self Improvement - Vulnerability and Resistance

Over the years, based on my specific education, experience and service offerings, I tend to attract clients that have some common characteristics. Some of my clients are seeking simple wellness services such as massage & bodywork. Other clients come in for more in-depth services. This article discusses some ideas and concepts regarding clients who are seeking to make significant changes in their life and improve their situation and outcome.

When it comes to services such as counseling, psychotherapy, therapeutic hypnosis or treating trauma or sexual dysfunction issues, it is often challenging for a client to achieve and sustain their stated goals. In many cases, that is why a client has come to see me. Frequently, I see clients who have had an extended history of frustration, unhappiness, emotional stress, lack of satisfying life improvement or a past history of seeing many types of helping professionals. In some of these situations, we use Integrative Bodywork as a unique approach to make significant progress. (There is another blog article about Integrative Bodywork on the blog site.) In other situations we use a more traditional blend of services to provide assistance.

In either case, when a client says that they have long standing or unsatisfactory improvement, I have observed that there seems to be a common thread. In the counseling and psychotherapy field, there is a label that exists for the lack of a client's progress within the therapeutic process - resistance. I am not a big supporter of any type of "label."  But, "resistance" is a particularly distressing label. In the majority of professional literature and the helping professional's education, when a client is considered to be "resisting" - the focus of the work shifts. Resistance is seen as a somewhat active process where the client is viewed as the cause for the failure of the process. This concept suggests that it is because of this resistance that the client can not make or sustain the necessary changes or obtain the necessary "insight" required for them to achieve their goals. The "resistance" label can serve to take the counselor or therapist off-the-hook as a major factor in why things are not going as planned. 

My view of this process is different. I would like to replace the word "resistance" with the word "vulnerability." People, by the very nature of being human, are creatures of habit and routine. This is rooted in our biological need to survive. It is important for us to be able to predict where our shelter is, where we get our next meal, where we can obtain clothes, or how we can maintain safety. The need for predictability and routine is hardwired in us. Consistency is a survival mechanism.

Over time, even when things are not going the way we want - when we are stressed, when we are emotionally upset, anxious, depressed, sexually dysfunctional, or in a bad relationship; we may try to perpetuate that unhealthy norm. Regardless of the fact that we know things could be better or we need to make a change - the perceived discomfort of the unknown can cause a person to "resist" making obvious changes, or abandon progress toward improvement. I just used the word "resist" as a descriptive word - not as an active intention.

It is my opinion that many people or clients do not make or sustain, what appear to be obvious and obtainable improvements, because of actual or perceived vulnerability and not resistance. While this distinction might not seem like a big deal - I think it can be, and is, for many people. Accepting vulnerability as a roadblock to progress, rather than focusing on resistance, changes the whole approach to helping someone make improvements and achieve their goals. Rather than spending time addressing reasons why a person can't make changes, the focus shifts to understanding and exploring how a person can feel safe and understand what it means to change. When a person is having issues, change requires a step into the unknown. For some, even a very dysfunctional lifestyle is safe compared to the unknown. For some, even an abusive relationship is more comfortable than the unknown situation of  being alone or on one's own. For some, any change (EVEN POSITIVE CHANGE) that challenges their idiosyncratic norm, is seen as less desirable because making change is a step into the unknown. Change represents an exposure of vulnerabilities that challenge the here-and-now.

Exploring how someone can make changes is even more complicated if their emotional, physical or cognitive capabilities are already compromised by their current situation. In some cases, to one degree or another, successful and sustained change may require a person to re-invent their life and who they are. This could mean a change in geography, friends, activities, family associates, employment... all those potential changes lead to a potential increase of a sense of vulnerability. When this sense of vulnerability outweighs the need for change - there is a lessened motivation for making or sustaining change - aka "resistance."

I could go on and on - but I think you get the point. Regardless of how much people may want to make changes in their life, they need to learn how to make the changes. Knowing how to make changes requires addressing what life means after the changes occur.  Work that focuses on exploring what the future looks like, possible outcomes, addressing what-if scenarios, establishing self efficacy and hardiness all contribute to diminishing a sense of vulnerability to change. When vulnerability is reduced - progress occurs. For more information about Wishing Wellness - click here. 

Integrative Bodywork Explained

This article explains how Integrative Bodywork can provide a pathway to health and wellness. Integrative Bodywork is extremely helpful and useful for people seeking simple relief, wellness and well-being.  You may see references to Integrative Bodywork (IB) in various locations on the web. IB is a term used by various people for various reasons. Our concept of IB began to be developed in 1999 and has been evolving since.

In 1999 we were working with a variety of clients who were seeking improvement with mental, emotional, physical or spiritual issues.  More than a few of the clients had been involved in seeking "helping professionals" over a number of years. Some of the clients' situations were complicated by being involved in the judicial system or as a result of being among people who were nonsupportive of positive change and more supportive of unhealthy choices and lifestyles.

Wherever they were on in addressing with their issues, the more significantly impacted clients had a few things in common:

It was very tough for them to make the changes they wanted
Over some period of time, if positive changes did occur, the changes didn't last
No option for help seemed to really work or connect
A sense of calm and peace was lacking
General agitation was present which led to emotional, mental, physical or spiritual unrest
Personal relationships were either superficial, non-existent, volatile, or enmeshed
They had a sense that they were trapped in a situation, body, or life that was fighting them
   
My background is somewhat unique. I straddle several professional roles and have education, experience and background in multiple areas. My background presented the opportunity for me to observe clients, who came to me for one reason, obtain unanticipated benefits in other areas not directly expected from their primary interaction with me. Over the course of several years, this happened frequently and sometimes the results were pretty significant. I could go into a number of case examples, but it might be more useful to stay a little more general and explain the possible "why" of how this occurred.

In short, I have studied many different wellness concepts that appear, at first, to have very little relationship with each other. What I observed with IB and the results clients experienced was that a blend of concepts and techniques drawn from massage & bodywork, meridian based acupressure, energy work (primarily Reiki), yogic meditation & breath work, Neo-Ericksonian hypnosis and aromatherapy had a synergistic effect. A blend of these techniques, based on the client's presentation and goals, seems to provide significant results. I am hesitant to say this, because I don't want to set an unrealistic expectation - but in some situations, with some clients, the client stated that they obtained more improvement from one session that they had ever received for years via other more mainstream and silo based methods. Even when less dramatic results were obtained, the results were still significant.

The results have very little to do with me. It has to do with the blend of techniques and the delivery. I am becoming more and more convinced that language is not a very good tool to use to address many wellness and well-being issues. Verbal communication is a very cognitive, preconditioned, often misinterpreted, faulty delivery method, when it is used as the primary method to address issues of wellness. Often, the communication channel is so affected and conditioned by past issues that it is relatively useless as a tool to help make improvements. Also, verbal communication inherently relies heavily on conscious cognitive processes which, almost by definition, are not optimal if someone is seeking to improve their situation. In some situations, techniques that rely on unconscious, non-verbal methods seem more effective. It may be true that silence is golden.

Even in situations where unconscious body memory or physical touch may elicit a client's awareness recall of a physical accident or abuse and evoke a response; non-verbal, unconscious, directly contrasting healthy touch or sensations can immediately offset years of prior patterning and conditioning. This is especially true if concurrent methods are used to reduce the physiological reaction and reset a baseline that supports the parasympathetic nervous system (rest, digest, relax, recover). The baseline reset can be facilitated and anchored by breath work, visualization, hypnosis... The effective power is in the blend of the multi-modality delivery.

I do not personally or professionally consider IB "fringy." I know not everyone will agree. IB crosses multiple disciplines, models and professions. The concept of touching clients as a form of "therapy" is controversial. However, while much simpler in delivery and extent than our IB process, there is a growing collection of research and support for a basic component of IB. The Veteran's Administration and the military are gathering research and support for simple massage as supportive treatment for PTSD. In our IB model, the disciplines are blended and delivered by a single multi-modality practitioner. This option leverages continuity, encourages transference and offers real-time flexibility.

I know that the above explanation is presented in a pretty dry and clinical way. In delivery, IB is a very peaceful, restful, nurturing and relaxing process. This article also addressed some of the more extreme scenarios related to IB. IB is also very useful and helpful for clients who are simply seeking a powerful and holistic session to help fine tune or optimize and already healthy and centered status. Click here for more information about Wishing Wellness.

What Happens Naturally

I walked across the street from the office this morning - I was impressed by what I saw. I thought I would share the picture that I took. Apparently even nature can appear to have conflicting moods; appearing calm on the surface, yet something very strong brewing at the same time. I imagine, as you also probably know, this could be the same for people at times. The interesting thing is, nature is, what it is. A raw form of energy, pure, powerful and inherently self-sustaining. Here long before us and certainly here after we leave. Apparently it is a natural state for Nature (capital "N" here intended) to co-exist with contrasts and diversity. It just happens - naturally. Often, when people encounter what appear to be conflicting energies, emotions, or thoughts, they frequently struggle to resist the dichotomy or confusion. Singularity or simplicity of purpose seems to be a human goal. I felt encouraged after seeing what I saw this morning. Learning from a perfect teacher - Nature; I may choose to look deeper into what I try to simplify and sort out. Maybe strangeness, diversity, complexity, struggle, even chaos, are simply experiences that I need to perceive and accept - Naturally.